- from On Friendship by Kahlil Gibran
I was truly warmed by the responses I got after my last newsletter about friendship. It showed me that friendships are important to us; they matter; we are invested in deepening and expanding our friend love.
I wanted to share a few more personal reflections around friendship + let you know about our upcoming book club meeting on the same topic. I also created an online school that will house my writing, workshops, and other offerings. More below!
Deep friendship feels like floating, effortlessly, on the ocean’s surface. I can feel my splayed limbs completely held by the density of salt water. The soft waves rock my body to a rhythm that soothes me. I don’t have to grip or hold or anticipate resisting. I can let go, completely. This is what deep friendship feels like. To be so utterly and weirdly myself in front of my friends - to fully let go into myself - feels like floating.
Deep friendship teaches me about what it means to be fluid. We dance from emotional vulnerability to playful laughter and back again. We experience the depth of being, the lightness of being, and everything in between. All of it exists in the same space and we are able to swirl and twirl within it all. This fluidity is a testament to the work and time we’ve put into the relationship.
My deepest friendships have exposed me to the intersectionality of love. The way I love, and am loved by, my friends directly influences the love I experience in other relationships. It reminds me of what Bell Hooks writes:
“Satisfying friendships, in which we share mutual love, provides a guide for behavior in other relationships, including romantic ones.”
By witnessing my friends be brave enough to be themselves, I’ve learned to be daring enough to bare my own strange, loving, expressive parts. Being able to do this with my closest friends gives me the confidence to be more of myself in any context. My friends remind me that I don’t have to reserve myself; that resiliency is the ability to stretch myself across many contexts. And if someone doesn’t understand me or take to me, it’s ok, because I have the affirming arms of my friends to fall back into.
A N N O U N C E M E N T S
*Next Book Club Meeting*
We’ll be meeting virtually on Wednesday July 12th @ 7pm est to talk about intimacy within friendships. Please register for our meeting here (it’s free!). You can read this article to inspire our conversation.
*Online School Open*
I started an online school through Teachable! You can now buy my zine Over the Pants as well as my Dirty Talk & Sexual Communication workshop. Find more out here.